


You Can't Save People You Can Only Love Them

by DarkLacrymosa



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Abusive Deceit Sanders, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Blood and Injury, Deceit Sanders Being An Asshole, Depression, Heavy Angst, Hurt Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, My First Fanfic, Nightmares, Physical Abuse, READ LAST CHAPTER FOR MORE INFORMATION, Rewrite - Ode To Sleep, Self-Harm, Verbal Abuse, Why Did I Write This?, abandoned, discontinued, rewritten
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-13
Updated: 2019-06-15
Packaged: 2019-10-09 10:51:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 4,656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17405546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkLacrymosa/pseuds/DarkLacrymosa
Summary: Virgil always wore a hoodie. Never let it ride up over his wrists, never took it off.Thomas can summon his sides at bad times, logan with a onsie on, etc.But then he summons Virgil to help with video planning. But Virgil isn't wearing his hoodie. And all the other sides get a shock they weren't expecting...A/N : this is my first fanfiction I don't know what I'm doing actually just read it pls I'm tired I don't know how to summerise. Also please read the tags I don't want anyone to get triggered this will contain self harm!!!HELLO IM GOING TO REWRITE THIS READ LAST CHAPTER FOR MORE INFORMATION.!!!!REWRITE - ODE TO SLEEP.READ LAST CHAPTER XXX





	1. What have I become? I'm sorry

**Author's Note:**

> Hello this is my first fanfiction so.. Yeah if its terrible please don't kill me I'm sorry. Also I didn't go over this after I wrote it so it's probably full of mistakes sorry if that's irritating. So. Yeah.  
> -  
> DarkLacrimosa

Virgil sat on his bed,his breath coming in short, ragged gasps as he desperately tried to fight off a panic attack that he knew would come one way or another. Oh god his breathing exercises weren't working! Tears streamed down his pale face, blurring and ruining what remained of his makeup. The anxious side hunched over, sobbing as he tried so hard just to breathe.  
**You could always do what you used to do.**  
Virgil froze at the voice that crept into his head. “No, no I can't - I - “  
**Oh come on. It's not as if the others would care? I know that's what you were thinking. The other sides, the important ones, don't really care about you, you worthless side, you** -  
“Shut up! I get it.” he whimpered to himself. It was stupid of him to talk out loud, he knew, since it just made him sound insane. But.  
His panic attack wasn't going anywhere. So Virgil promising himself this would be the last time, frantically pulled at his hoodie until it came off. Under the black and purple patched jacket, he was wearing a dark grey shirt,that showed off his arms perfectly.

And therefore his scars.  
They ran up and down his arms, deep, shallow. Some long, slashed, others carefully cut. The others didn't know. No-one knew. Except Virgil. And there, on his forearm were two healing cuts. He felt more tears prickling at his arms as he remembered the most recent video, The Nightmare Instead Of Christmas, when Deceit appeared. That had been bad enough, and it had brought back oh-so-carefully hidden memories of the dark sides…

**********  
Anxiety screamed.  
“Deceit! I'm sorry I didn't mean to oh god - “ he screamed in pain as Deceit kicked the younger side three times in the stomach. “ When - will - you - learn - to - damn - listen - to me!” Deceit roared, punctuating each word with a hefty kick at the anxious side. Anxiety cried and rolled over into the mess of a broken mug he had dropped. That was all he'd done, dropped a fucking mug. However he knew that it took less than that to set Deceit off and he should have been more careful. This was Virgil's fault, and he deserved every bruise and cut Deceit gave him. Of course it's your fault. You don't deserve anything better.  
He closed his eyes as Deceit pulled him up and slammed him into the wall…

 

*********  
Pulling himself out the flashback, Virgil shakily pulled himself up, dragging his weak body to his bathroom.  
**That's right. You are weak. And pathetic.**  
He slowly opened the door,and reached up for the cabinet. Some part of his brain screamed for him to stop, stop stop! But he didn't.  
He fumbled around in the cupboard for a second when a shiny blade dropped up. He lunged for it, and picked it up. The anxious side hesitated for moment but then pressed it to his arm. Blood began trickling down his arm, and he felt a faint relief as the pain started to quieten the voices. He gritted his teeth, then took it off his arm and slashed his arm once, twice, three times. The white floor of the bathroom was slowly beginning to flood with crimson liquid. Virgil relaxed slightly and closed his eyes.  
Suddenly, he felt Thomas summoning him.  
Oh god. Oh god no.  
Thomas's voice suddenly rung through his room.  
“Virge? You there?”  
Virgil pushed himself off the bathroom floor and began to get back to his room. I need my hoodie I can't let the others see me like this they'll hate me oh god he thought. But then Thomas decided to force Virgil to rise up, knowing something was wrong. Virgil couldn't fight it off and he closed his eyes as he rises up into Thomas's house, blood still running down his arm.  
“Virgil! Final- Virgil!”  
“Oh my god!“  
Someone screamed. Virgil looked up to see the others frozen. He stared at them, before passing out and crumpling to the foot of the stairs…

*******  
A/N:okay now we're going back in time to before Virgil rises up and this is from the others POV! Sorry if its bad.

“But couldn't we - no that's a terrible idea actually. Um Patton? Logan? Any ideas?” Roman was pacing around Thomas's living room, looking pissed.

They had all been trying to think of an idea for another video, but for some reason Thomas had a terrible headache and couldn't think and that was affecting the others.  
“I don't have an idea. I propose we summon Virgil, and we ask him of his opinion. Right?” Logan said. Patton nodded, and raised his arm to summon the absent side. He didn't appear. The moral side frowned and tried again. Nothing. “He's not answering! What if he's ducked out again?” Patton said, beginning to worry for his dark strange son. Logan looked horrified at this suggestion and spun round to face Thomas. “Thomas. Do you fear death?” he said to his host.  
“I-What? Of course I fear death, I - oh. I still have my anxiety, if that's what you mean. Why isn't Virgil answering? Do any of you know?” Thomas asked his sides. They all shook their heads.  
“Thomas, kiddo, you could summon Virge, you know. If he's summoned by his host he'll have to rise up, because it could be important. Right, Lo?” Patton bit his lip in fear. Logan frowned.  
“Yes, I suppose Thomas could summon Virgil but there is a possibility Virgil could resist. He may be having a panic attack, perhaps. And if he rises up, it would affect Thomas as well!” he realized.  
“But if our Dark Prince is having a panic attack or something of that sort, surely we should go and help him? It isn't right to leave him alone I mean - Wait! Thomas you said that you had been feeling off all morning! Didn't you?” Roman said excitedly. Looking at his host hopefully.  
“Yeah. I do feel a bit off but - that might not be because of Virgil.”  
“It could be. And if it's Virgil then we must help him. If it isn't, then we can work out what it is with The Chemically Imbalanced Romance. Oh, also Thomas you could send Virgil a message. A thought, so to speak. To let him know you're going to summon him. He could be otherwise engaged.” Roman finished his speech. Looking thoughtful, Logan turned to Thomas - “He's right, you know.”  
“Okay,so how do I send this message thought thing to V?”  
“Just concentrate on who you want to send the thought to, and what you want to say.”  
“Okay”. Thomas closed his eyes and concentrated on Virgil, and thought of what he would say. ‘Virge? You there?’.  
And then he gritted his teeth and made Virgil rise up.  
He opened his eyes when he saw the anxious side looking.. Scared? “Virgil! Final-Virgil!” he whispered.  
The anxious side wasn't wearing his hoodie and blood was running down his arm and dripping on the carpet. He raised his head and looked at them for a moment,looking utterly exhausted, before falling to the ground, as he fainted. The other sides ran and Logan pulled his friend off the ground first. They stared at his arms in horror. Covered in white scars, that ran up and down, some slashed others done almost neatly. Three fresh cuts were bleeding quite heavily from his forearm. They weren't particularly deep but they were long and across at least half of his forearm. His left hand was bloody from the cuts on his right arm. Roman felt sick as he looked at his unconscious friend, knowing that at least some of these scars could be his fault.  
**Or all of them. You're the one who bullied him. Caused this. It's your fault** -  
Shut up!  
**Ha**!  
Roman turned to Logan, “Should we move him?” he asked, his voice trembling. Logan nodded wordlessly.  
“I'll get something to clean the cuts with.” The logical side said after a moment,his voice devoid of any emotion. He turned away, to go to Thomas's bathroom where their host kept bandages, etc.  
Roman turned to Virgil and began to run his fingers through his dark purple tinted hair, eyes closing. Then Virgil stirred. “Princey? W-What-” he froze as he realised he wasn't wearing his hoodie.  
“Oh. Oh god.”


	2. I have a question for you all!!!!!

Hello! I'm just in the stages of planning the next chapter, but

I don't know what to do so I was wondering if a couple of you could suggest ideas? Because I came up with like 3 plot ideas and all of them have encountered a problem and um yeah it's just irritating so could some of you just give me a little inspiration I think it would really help I'll delete this note after I've got the next chapter up so sorry for not updating!!  
-  
DarkLacrimosa


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is really short, and I know but I just wanted to get something up here and I'll add more soon

Chapter two  
“Oh. Oh god.” Virgil whispered in horror. His arms had almost stopped bleeding now, but they were caked in blood which did nothing to hide the other scars. Whimpering, he tried to get away from the person holding him.  
Get off me please don't hate me I'm sorry this is my fault please don't hate me  
“Shhhhh, shhh it's okay, it's okay, it's okay.” a soothing and familiar voice spoke above him. Virgil raised his head to see Roman. Wait, Roman? What? But - Roman hates me. Doesn't he? “Hey there, V.” the creative side said. Virgil began to tremble and his hand unconsciously went to his arm and he started to scratch at the scabbed over cuts, causing them to bleed again. Roman looked horrified and took the smaller sides hands in his own and held him closer, not realising that the physical contact was making Virgil's anxiety worse.  
Oh god it's like what Deceit used to do oh god no please don't - no don't think about that Roman wouldn't he wouldn't -  
Really? He wouldn't? He hates you enough. They all do. You're just needed for Thomas's safety. They would hate you if it wasn't for that.  
No please please Roman get off me Roman please  
“V? You okay? I'm not going to hurt you. I promise.” Roman could see how tense the younger side had become and if the expression on his face was anything to go by, he was clearly expecting something bad to happen. But what? Why was Virgil so tense? “Virge? You okay there?” Roman said nervously,knowing that his and the anxious side's friendship was shaky at best. Virgil wriggled in the older side's grasp, trying to free himself. “L-let m-m-me go Roman! Let me go please please I'm sorry let me go!” Virgil continued to struggle despite Roman whispering you're fine, you're alright, you're safe, there's nothing to be scared of.  
Roman hugged his littler friend, trying so hard to make him feel safe, and loved. But deep down he knew just a hug wouldn't help V. They should have been there from the start, not have just damn assumed that he was okay, just because he told them a few personal things! We should've been there for you Virge. I'm sorry. 

“Roman?” Logan came closer, holding medical supplies and glanced at the anxious side, who was curled up and trembling in Roman's arms. The cuts on his arm had started to bleed again, and Logan knew he had to clean them which, looking at the state of him wouldn't be easy. He knelt down and nodded at Patton who was with Thomas who had his head in his hands. Thomas seemed to have been hit the hardest, due to the fact he was feeling all of their emotions and his own.  
Logan sighed and tried to separate Virgil from Roman but he whimpered and attempted to burrow into the creative side's arms despite his efforts earlier to escape. Clearly, he didn't want to be touched but wanted to separated from Roman less for some reason. Roman glared at Logan. “Lo! Leave him! He doesn't want to be touched.” Roman hissed. Logan frowned.  
“But the cuts-”  
“Okay! Just don't make him uncomfortable.”  
Logan carefully, and gently pulled Virgil's arm towards him, letting him stay curled up, not looking at any of them. Pouring out antiseptic to clean the cuts with and pressing it to the wounds, gritting his teeth when Virgil winced in pain, as he didn't want to hurt his friend.  
But you have hurt him. Some of these cuts will be your fault. You all left him alone, and yet you expect him to trust you? You heartless -  
Shut up! We're helping him now. That's what counts.  
Right?  
Logan slowly wiped away blood, furiously blinking back tears.  
*****  
Meanwhile, Thomas was trying not to cry. He could feel the other's emotions, albeit dimmed down, but still there. Roman felt.. guilty. And he blamed himself. Logan was blocking all his emotions, but he was clearly suppressing tears. Patton considered it his fault for not noticing. Virgil… Virgil was scared. So scared. Thomas hated himself the moment he saw those scars. He remembered all the past times they had rejected V, and all the times he had made his disdain for Anxiety (because Anxiety was not Virgil. Virgil wasn't the mask he had put up to protect himself, that had ultimately turned on him) clear, and all the times the sides had insulted him,not knowing the damage that it did. The side's host looked up, and stared at Virgil, who was curled into Roman and refusing to let go.  
Thomas could only guess at what had caused Virgil to cut today, but he knew that he and the other sides were going to find out and fix it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil has a nightmare about Deceit, and Roman is the only side there to comfort him. Whilst the others hunt Virgil's room for sharp objects.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am SO sorry for not updating, I had the worst writers block for this ever and then we had loads of tests at school (I had to revise) but here you go, here's a short chapter - warning for blood and injury and also Implied Deceit being a real dick.

Virgil was sleeping. It had been hours since he had first risen up - or been forced to - and he had eventually fallen asleep to Roman singing softly to him. Now Roman had carefully laid him down on Thomas's sofa. Thomas himself had disappeared, into the Mind Palace with Logan and Patton to Virgil's room, with the intent of taking all sharp things from his room. Roman had protested, telling them that Virgil wouldn't want his things disturbed, but they didn't listen. They never listened. Instead they just left Roman with a sleeping Virgil who was currently moving and twitching in his sleep. Roman frowned. Nightmare, he thought. “V?” he whispered. Virgil simply started to thrash. “No! Deceit… I - sorry - no.” he cried. Roman's eyes widened. Deceit. What? Virgil screamed. Roman froze. “Logan?”he said, trying to summon the side. “I need you up here now - V's having a nightmare.” Surely Logan would know what to do? Roman knew he and Virgil weren't on the best of terms, and in light of recent events, Virgil might not be happy to wake up to a panicking Roman. “Virge! It's just a dream, you have to wake up!” he said, gently shaking V. Virge only cried out again and started to talk faster. “No! Please I'll do anything, get off me! Get off me! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!”

Roman hesitated, knowing what he was about to do would make it worse. But if he didn't, he wasn't sure what else Virgil would say. And he didn't want to hear anymore, or he would inevitably hunt Deceit down and kill him. So, he shook Virgil harder.. And then yelled at him. “Virgil! Wake up!”he screamed. Virgil's eyes flew open, his breathing already speeding up. He curled into himself, and began to mutter under his breath. “One, two, three, four..” he repeated his breathing exercise, until the panic attack got so bad he could barely breathe through the sobs that racked his small body. Roman didn't even hesitate to drag the smaller man into his arms and tried to calm him down. “ C'mon, Virge, breathe with me, okay? It's going to be okay, it's Roman.”he added, as the smaller side didn't appear to know where he was or what was happening. Virgil just cried harder, until his breathing was so shallow Roman could barely hear each individual breath.

************

Meanwhile, Logan, Patton and Thomas were all looking in Virgil's room. They found a sharp kitchen knif, a razor blade covered in dried blood and a lighter that looked like it might have been used. They also found bandages, and medical supplies. Each winced when they found a bloody stained hoodie in his dirty laundry basket. Logan went to his desk and felt around in the drawer of his desk before he yelled in pain and shock and yanked his hand back - it was bleeding. Crimson liquid ran down his wrist from a cut across three of his fingers. Thomas walked over to the desk and opened the drawer as far as it would go - it was stiff and that was why Logan hadn't been able to open it the full way. Inside he found another knife, which Logan had slashed his fingers on, unaware of its existence. Logan winced when Thomas took his hand and wiped away the blood that had dripped steadily on to the dark purple carpet, unnoticed by each side.

 _Drip, drip, drip_. Blood continued to fall in a river down his hand. “Those cuts are deep. You need to go get some bandages - they might even need stitches.” Thomas said, as the side's host inspected his hand. Logan nodded, but just as he pulled away Roman's voice floated from thin air. “Logan! I need you up here - V's having a nightmare!” Logan glanced at Thomas.

“You two stay here. I'll go help Roman. Okay? Also, I would like you to find Deceit if you can. He and Virgil must have known each other before Virgil came to live with us.” Patton and Thomas nodded.

"I know where his room is - I think Virgil mentioned it once.” Patton answered. Logan nodded, and sank out. He rose up to hysterical sobbing and Roman's voice speaking quietly and quickly.

 

“.. - eathe, okay? Logan!” the creative side said looking relieved at the entrance of his friend. Horror crossed his face when he realised that Logan was bleeding. “There's blood on your face!” Logan blinked and then realised he must have rubbed his face with his bloody hand. “Doesn't matter. Virgil, can you hear me? It is Logan. You are safe, nobody will hurt you. Okay?” It took Roman and Logan half an hour to calm Virgil down, each of them hiding their terror of what had scared Virgil so much in his dream. Roman had managed to relay to the Logical side that Deceit had been a main part of the nightmare, and he had clearly been hurting the anxious side for years whilst he lived with them. Logan wasn't sure he wanted to know what Deceit had done to their emo, but he knew he would be helping Roman destroy that bastard. Nobody hurt Virgil and got away with it.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil's thoughts after last chapter's nightmare

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BTW  
> Bold text is Virgil's depression or anxiety   
> Italalics is his thoughts.

“Virgil?” 

“Virgil, talk to me.”

“Please Virge.”

Virgil frowned. What? Why were the others near him, why had they helped him with his panic attack. Everything suddenly came crashing back down on him, and he remembered all that thad happened. Cold horror took hold of him, and the voices in his head began to whisper. 

**Stupid.**

**Worthless side - they don't care about you, they are only keeping you around until they can get rid of you.**

**You only hurt Thomas.**

**Just lock yourself in your room - as long as you protect Thomas, they won't care. They don't want to see you.**

_Shut up! Shut up, they do care about me_ **..**

**Stop lying to yourself.**

_Why won't you leave me alone?_ ****

**Because you need to hear the truth from somebody. And I'm your depression.**

**Worthless.**

**Nothing.**

**Burden.**

**Unlovable.**

**Die already.**

**Affliction.**

**You're not a side, you're a mental condition - and you need to go.**

**Thomas hates you.**

**Roman hates you.**  

_No! Roman doesn't hate me, he can't._

_Does he?_  

 

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil has a talk with Roman and Logan.  
> Things happen with Virgil and Roman.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I am not entirely sure how long it's been since the last chapter, but some things came up and I got really bad writers block - I wrote two other versions of this chapter and deleted them, until I wrote this.
> 
>  
> 
> Half an hour ago. Anyway, sorry that this is so short I promise that the next chapter will be long and also next chapter there won't be such fluff as in this chapter.   
> -  
> DarkLacrimosa

“Virgil?”

“Virgil, talk to me.”

“Please, Virge.”

Roman, frowning, reached out to take Virgil's hand when the anxious side abruptly sat up, pushing away his worried friends. Both sides blinked when they saw the expression on the small side's face. He looked sort of… Scared. Of how they might react. He suddenly lunged forward and snatched his hoodie up, roughly pulling on his skinny body;to cover the scars on his arms. “Virgil.”

“Y-yes,Logan?” Virgil glanced up through his lashes, not wanting to look at the logical side. _Please, please don't hate me._  

“During your panic attack, you mentioned Deceit.” Logan informed Virgil, who immediately looked defensive. “I'm not with him! I promise, we weren't friends, please believe me!”

“I know you're not with Deceit, Virgil. I just want to know the nature of your relationship with him.”

“We weren't friends. Never. Not even in the beginning!”

“Ah. You resided with him for a while, didn't you? Why didn't you come to our side of the Mind Palace?”

“You hated me! Deceit said you hated me and wanted me gone, and that he'd tried to get rid of me, give me to you but you'd told him you hated me!” Virgil snapped. Then he started to shake. 

“H-he always told me you hated me! And then, when I did go to the light sides rooms, you all rejected me. You only started to accept me because Thomas needed me,and if he didn't you would still have hated me.”

“No.”

“What?”

Roman stared at Virgil. “V. I know I was cruel to you. I know you haven't forgiven me for that. I understand. I haven't forgiven myself for that either. But please. Listen to me. I don't hate you. I never hated you, we always thought you hated us!”

“but -” 

“It's not an excuse for what I did to you, I know. But I, just hoped you could find it in your heart to forgive me?”Roman whispered. 

Virgil's eyes began to fill with tears. Roman doesn't hate me. Maybe he might feel what I feel towards him? 

Roman hesitated, and turned to look at Logan, who smirked. “I'm going to find Patton and Thomas.” the logical side said, sinking out. Roman turned round to look at Virgil. “Virgil, recently, I - well, uh-”

“Just spit it out Princey. I'm hardly going to get all offended, am I? I've dealt with worse.”

“IlikeyouVirgil!” Roman burst out. Virgil opened his mouth but said nothing. 

“You- - wha - why? Why, Roman?” he whispered. Roman looked down. 

“I'm sorry, my Dark Prince. I understand you don't like me back I never expected this of you -”

“Shut up.” Virgil said. “And don't you dare assume something like that.” 

“hang on, wait you're saying you like-”

He was cut off by Virgil leaning in and slamming his rough lips against the older. “Shut up, Princey.”

 


	7. I'm sorry

Guys im sorry im not going to be able to update this for a while.   
So basically, this kind of fanfiction - when I write it I have to be in a certain mood, I don't know. Anyway at the moment I am really not up to writing things with self harm and depression (personal reasons.) so yeah. I'm sorry. It's just not going to be good for my mental health.   
Although I do have another fanfiction I CAN update because it doesn't deal with really dark topics   
Sorry guys   
-  
DarkLacrimosa


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a flashback of when Virgil first appeared and I've decided Thomas was 13.  
> Warning for Deceit hitting Virgil by the way!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M BACK.  
> Soooo today im ill and I'm not at school so I wrote this and I have written part of the next chapter but it needs a lot of work.   
> I am so sorry for leaving it this long guys! I just didn't have time but now I do.. So hi.  
> Hope you enjoy this and again, sorry for the wait!  
> -  
> DarkLacrymosa

_The new side stood in the cold, misty space that all forgotten ideas went to. This side was small, and even though he didn't know it, he was having an effect on their 13 year old host._

_He had seen the other sides, Morality, Logic and Creativity and he was jealous of how.. Happy they seemed. Perhaps he could go and introduce himself?_

 

_But he thought they might laugh at his name - and he wasn't exactly certain of his purpose yet, anyway. So he stayed here, drifting, unaware that he could be forgotten entirely if he stayed in this place._

 

_He froze. Footsteps, he heard footsteps! But there wasn't anyone here? Were there_ other _sides?_

_“What are you doing here?” a side (or he hoped the new boy was a side.) walked forwards. He had snake scales! How odd. “I am Deceit. You're a new side, what's your name?"_

_The new side said nothing._

_" Oh come on, I don't bite! I just wanna help you and its rude to stay silent!"_

_The boy frowned. What was he, exactly? Then it came to him._

_“My name is Anxiety.”_

 

_“Don't you have another name? All sides have their purpose, yes, but do you have another name? For example, I'm known as Dee.”_

_“Uh...No,i don't think I do.”_

_“Ah. Maybe you've been here too long. Anyway, you can come with me back to where the Dark Sides and the Neutral Sides live.”_

_“Dark sides? Am I a dark side, then?” Anxiety felt sick. He'd watched the main sides and had always longed to join them, but had always come back here. Now, this side, Deceit or Dee, was telling him he was dark._

_“Of course you are, silly. You can't do anything positive for Thomas, he'd probably be fine without you but you can't leave. If you appeared, then you appeared for a reason.”_

_Anxiety frowned. If you were a side, then you were something useful, he'd always thought. But apparently he wasn't._

_“are there other Dark Sides?”_

_“Of course! There's Rage, Sleep - or Laziness - Me, you and Apathy. Now, come on. It's boring if we stay here and I don't like all your stupid questions. I'll explain everything later!” Anxiety nodded and followed Dee out the misty place he'd lived on for so long._

 

_***************************_

_((5 WEEKS LATER))_

_Anxiety stalked downstairs, his hoodie pulled up over his eyes, the black eyeliner he'd summoned ringing his eyes. And matching the black bruise blooming on his pale skin near his jaw._

_“Sleep?” he said nervously. He wanted an honest opinion on his eyeliner - Dee had laughed at him. Sleep didn't answer, he was snoring on the couch. Oh well. He could wait._

_Deceit had been nice enough until Anxiety irritated Rage and made Thomas angry and Thomas had been grounded for yelling. Deceit had yelled at Anxiety and hit him. He was still in shock, and the bruise wasn't helping._

 

_He hadn't really cared though. It was Thomas’s 14th birthday soon and he'd been panicking when he learnt that they were going bowling for the day and then to the cinema._

_All the things that could go wrong had bombarded him and he'd caused Thomas to have a panic attack. Not that he'd said anything about it, their host was too scared about the development of an anxiety disorder to say anything._

_Deceit had still been angry, and seemed to be taking out his anger on the younger side._

 

_Well, maybe it would get better. He'd just have to wait and Deceit would say sorry and never hurt him again._

_Right?_

 


	9. Yo im back. No, this isn't an update. Read.

Hey!  
So, I know it's been like, months I've updated this, but it just really hasn't been going the way I wanted it to in ma head so.  
I r e-read this and yeah, I've come to the conclusion that it's pretty shit. My idea was, why don't I re-write it? Because this is fucking rushed. So. I'm gonna rewrite this and it's going to be the same plot, same ideas but hopefully better? anyway. Im gonna leave the original published though. (sorry for grammar mistakes here lmao im past the point of caring) it will probably be called : Ode To Sleep (yes that's a Twenty One Pilots song shut up-) (no, I don't know why I'm calling it that) (im bad at naming stories ok?)  
-  
DarkLacrymosa, (the author who can't write or update anything ffs)

UPDATE LATER TODAY - the first chapter will be out in the couple of days.!!!  
It will be called Ode To Sleep, if you didn't see up there.   
Stay alive frens! |-/  
-  
DarkLacrymosa

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment if you'd be interested in me re-writing this.


End file.
